*As reported last month, Gretchen Rossi has been ordered to appear
in court to provide information about her finances and assets. The appearance and examination of judgment has been rescheduled for
April 22, 2010. Original story can be found here.

Via text message:
D- “I have cramps so bad, I feel like I’m gonna die.”
H- “Put some frozen ground beef on your tummy.”
D- “Nobody should go through life without a friend like you.”

Perhaps she is relieved we can laugh about it now, and we are both alive to do so.
She is one of the best friends I have ever had and I absolutely love my mini-vacations to visit her in Ventura. My last visit was memorable in more ways than one.
We had spent the evening doing ‘girl’ things…painting our nails, eating, talking, laughing, crying, etc… We eventually fell asleep, safely watching t.v.
She awoke a few hours later with a toothache…
“Anbesol, use some Anbesol” I mumbled between snores.
After fumbling around for a few minutes, she informed me she couldn’t find anything she thought would work. Afraid of missing anymore ZZZZ’s I told her to get an ice pack, (2 ice packs…just let me sleep)
“It always works for me” I lied.
Evidently the coldness was adequate, at least long enough for her to fall back asleep.
What seemed like just a few hours later, the sun began piercing through her bedroom window just enough to slightly bring me out of the coma I had fallen back in to. I lay there with my eyes closed anticipating my morning walk to the beach. I had dolphins to see and couldn’t think of a better way to start my day. I decide if I got up sooner than later, I would make it back in time to see her off to work. I slowly open one eyeball at a time and roll over to take a quick glance at the clock. Beside me lies a puddle of blood. Oh dear God, what have I done now? I remember the fine print on my Ambien, the warning. I remember the stories I had heard of people sleep walking, driving, etc…
Had I unconsciously killed my best friend? I am now in panic mode.
“D” I asked, “you alive?”
After opening her eyes, we both lay there in shock.
“Uh-huh, you?”
“Yep”
Her t-shirt was soaked, as were the sheets and her pillow case.
“You o.k?” I ask
“I think so, you?”
Now I am wondering, am I o.k? Perhaps one of us was bleeding to death and were too numb from the loss of blood to realize it. It had to be her, after all, it was her pillow and t-shirt that were soiled.
“Don’t move” I warn her, “I am going to stand up”
Left leg, check.
Right leg, check.
I am now in an upright position and I’m o.k., Hallelujah!
(*note to self: reconsider the Ambien thing)
Not to get too excited, my friend after all is laying next to a puddle of blood. I bravely walk around to her side of the bed. Not too sure what to do next, we decide she should try to get up as well.
Left leg, check.
Right leg, check.
She is now in an upright position and she’s o.k., Hallelujah!
So no we both stand, upright, alive and confused. We decide to slowly disassemble the bedding, one piece at a time….th, th, that’s when we saw it. Imagine the horror/relief we felt when we discovered the “ice pack” she had grabbed in the middle of the night turned out to be a pound of frozen ground beef that had now thawed out.
As disgusting as it was, we laughed so hard we nearly peed our pants. We might have! She made me promise I would never tell anyone, I am her best friend, I wouldn’t do that! I have a feeling we’ll be friends forever, after all, we have been through so much together. If we could survive a ‘bloody toothache’ together, we can get through anything! Love you D!

“HEIDI ANNETTE what do you have?”
Noting she had used my middle name, I assure her, “It’s just a kitten”
“Who’s kitten is it?”
“It’s mine” I said in my proudest voice, “it’s all mine.”
I loved animals and had always wanted my very own cat, something I made clear more than enough times. As persistent as I was, the answer was always the same, you can get one…but not right now. Obviously cats must have been very expensive and my mom was just waiting until she could afford to buy me one. How else would a 7 year old rationalize having to wait?
“No, it’s not yours. Where did you get it?”
Convinced she would be relieved that she would no longer have to put all of her money in a kitty savings, and would be just as happy as I was, I proudly announced to her, “They were free today, so I thought I’d grab me one!”
I wasn’t kidding either. When the nice lady…with the box of kittens…sitting outside of an elementary school…as it let out…told us we could have one for free…today, I literally reached my hand through a crowd of people, into a box, and grabbed me one. MY new cat, Pixie fit in beautifully with our family. While it was made clear that it wasn’t o.k. to bring home an animal anytime I wanted, it doesn’t necessarily mean I didn’t try.

My mom still laughs about that day. I learned fast that it had nothing to do with building a kitty savings, animals are a lot of work…even for a 2nd grader!

That was the first of many “Pixies.” My love for animals, all animals has continued to grow throughout the years. Given the opportunity, I would have 1 of everything…or at the very least a sloth, a bear, a dolphin, a penguin, a deer, a monkey, a kangaroo, a manatee, a elephant, a Shetland pony and a opossum. I would also want an Avery with a large assortment of birds (any color would do thank you.)

I have done my share of rescuing strays throughout the years. Both of the cats I have now were strays that had decided to claim mi casa as their casa…and they are both purebred Persians. (Seriously, what are the chances of that?) What’s even more interesting is they weren’t siblings, or even playmates, they came to us 7 years apart. I have also had a few sick or injured animals appear as well. When I say appear, I’m not kidding. Despite my efforts, some of them recovered and some just didn’t make it. One of the more notable experiences was finding a 4 foot iguana in my garage. I opened the door to get the lawn mower, and there sprawled out on top of it was what appeared to be a mini dinosaur…staring at me. Huh? I couldn’t tell you how long I stood there rubbing my eyes and shaking my head before calling my kids out to confirm what I was seeing. This was one of the many situations that prompted some of my friends to start referring to me as Dr. Dolittle.

After determining he she it was friendly, we offered it some food and water. I sent the kids out to question the neighbors and I started making phone calls. About an  hour later, we loaded him her it into my car and headed to the mini dinosaur expert. It was in need of some medical attention, but was expected to make a full recovery. We went and visited “Mini D” a few times while it was recovering and were happy to find out that the mini dinosaur expert himself, had decided to adopt it. I love happy endings.

One of my favorite babies was Stella2. During nesting season we would end up with a variety of nests. I watched closely each year as the eggs were laid and hatched…naming each hatchling. Shocking, I know. (We had 4 finches hatch one year on the 4th of July. They were appropriately named: Ima, Yankee, Doodle and Dandy. Pretty clever huh?) A few years ago, we had 2 baby mockingbirds hatch right outside our back door, I had named them Stella and Stanley.

As I went to peak at them in the evening, I noticed that Stella was gone. We searched for her that night and then again in the morning…she was nowhere to be found. Stanley continued to thrive and oddly enough, stuck around for about 6 months (we moved, but he’s probably still there!) With his knock-knees, he was always easy to spot and could usually be found amongst a group of finches…with his mouth open. He so loved a free handout!

A few weeks later, my mom called and asked me to come over. Her and my dad had just returned from camping for a few weeks, obviously she had missed me, right? As I walked in grinning ear to ear, my mom came to the door to greet me. So this is what I remember…

“MOTHER what do you have?”
Noting I had called her MOTHER, she assures me, “It’s just a mockingbird”
“Who’s mockingbird is it?”
“It’s mine” she said in her proudest voice, “all mine.”
“No, it’s not yours. Where did you get it?”
(Alright~ so maybe that’s not exactly how it happened…)
They had found the baby mocker on the ground the day before. Thinking it had fallen, they returned it back to it’s nest, only to find it out again that evening. If a nestling is sick or deformed and the parents knows it has little chance to survive, they will get rid of it to make sure the food goes to the healthier ones. My mom knew the inevitable was bound to happen, but did not have the heart to leave it behind. (woot-I taught her well!!!) She brought her home to me  knowing I would be more than willing to keep her warm, comfortable and fed. I named her Stella2.

Having been through this before, I knew all I could do was hope for the best, prepare for the worst and let nature take it’s course. By the 2nd day, I started to wonder if this was my mom’s way of paying me back for grabbing me one of those free kittens. It didn’t seem like Stella2 was sick at all, as a matter of fact, Stella2 had more energy than Heidi. Since she wanted no part of being couped up, this is how we spent a lot of our time.

I really wish there was sound to hear her chirping.

It was this same day I noticed something…Stella2 didn’t have tail feathers. I couldn’t help but wonder if that was the reason she was booted from the nest, but was otherwise healthy. I looked online, everything I found said it was a “sign the bird was struggling to survive.” I then pulled up several pictures of other baby mockingbirds and compared them to Stella2. Although she did not look sick, there was a definite difference when I compared to a healthy baby. Poor Stella2, I hate sad endings.

She lived her short, little life to the fullest and did not have to die cold, hungry and alone. (*sniff* I still get teary eyed…) She was an absolute busy body joy and I wouldn’t have done a thing different. I’m so glad I have these videos!

So I have yet to encounter a bear, a kangaroo, a monkey or a elephant that needs my nurturing…but if I do, you can count on hearing about it! For now I’m content with my 2 cats, Filthy (don’t ask) & Oliver and my turtle, Kiwi.

By the way, did I mention my mom presented Kiwi to me and my kids in the midst of doing a 1,000 sq. foot addition to my house…on top of working 50+ hours a week? When I gave her that you-have-got-to-be-kidding-me look, she smiled and said, “I got it from a lady at work, they were free so I thought I’d grab you one.”
Gotta love karma!

.

Obviously, great minds think alike! A month or so later, I receive this picture in a text message…from my son.
Obviously, he got the talk, “Do you know it’s permanent? What if you change your mind in a year, or 2 years or 10 years?”

.

I laughed and I cried, I loved it! Truth be told, he could have tattooed BARTHOLOMEW in neon letters across his face and I would love it.
He’s here. He’s healthy. He’s happy.
Again, I am reminded how blessed I am.
Score! This tattoo conversation just got a whole lot easier!

A few days later I talked to him about what I wanted to do, explaining I still had no idea what I wanted to get. He suggested an Orchid. While doing research and trying to make his own decision, he learned that Orchids represent the type of cancer he had. I loved the idea and my decision was made. When I told my mom, she not only thought it was a great idea…she wanted one too! (Huh? But you’re my mom…you can’t get a tattoo….do you know it’s permanent…what if…)

A few days ago we went and got our Orchids, to remind us daily of his courage, his strength and his determination. To remind us how blessed we are, to remind us never to take life for granted.

No worries, I’m totally a pro at this now!

Maybe not so much…

…do you know how tender the top of you foot is?

(F.Y.I.) Pretty darn tender…

…but I’m not complaining, I’m celebrating!

My mom chose to put hers on her ankle. (I better get permission before I post pics. of her funny faces!)

Apparently I missed another season of Dancing With The Stars. Season 10’s celebrities were just announced and I’m still waiting for Jewel’s (Season 8 ) injury to heal. I’m a fan, obviously just not a very dedicated one.
Without further ado, meet this season’s stars:

All My Children’s Aiden Turner
Legendary astronaut Buzz Aldrin
Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver Chad Ochocinco
ESPN sports reporter Erin Andrews
Olympic skating champion Evan Lysacek
The Bachelor’s Jake Pavelka
Jon & Kate plus 8 TLC star Kate Gosselin
Lead singer of the Pussycat Dolls Nicole Scherzinger
Reno 911 comedian and Clean House host Niecy Nash
Baywatch babe Pamela Anderson
Actress Shannen Doherty

Good luck to everyone!
I was really surprised to see Kate Gosselin’s name…I am almost sure
I remember someone told me she had mentioned on Jon a Kate plus 8, that she despised dancing so much she wouldn’t even dance at her own wedding. Maybe this is part of the new and improved her…go Kate!

This season premiere’s on Monday, March 22nd, are you going to watch?

Totally been craving salads lately, lotsa, lotsa salad. This by far…is a favorite! Yeah, ignore the name because just between me and you, it’s berry special! I can almost assure you that if you were to order a “Nuttin’ Berry Special Salad” at your local eatery people may start whispering…about you. I haven’t a clue what the politically correct name is, this is just easier than addressing it as a salad with nuts and berries in it.
I think.

I know, those aren’t even blueberries in the picture, I had to improvise with cranberries. No, that’s not blush wine vinaigrette dressing either, I had to improvise with red wine vinaigrette. Improvising is good sometimes, and in this case it was just as tasty! (Berry tasty )
A. Must. Try.

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Can I get an Amen?